Here's some news for you fooz
This news has everything: a safety inspector's disregard for safety, a trunk full of mannequins, and a reckless driving/ car chase scene. Write a script and I'll direct. First direction: flip the car off a rollbar onto a pile of lady-mannequins; the hapless safety inspector, first aid kit in hand, lands on the mannequin store owner's daughter; cop arrives, slips on mannequin underclothes, needs first aid kit and the feminine recuperative touch; all standing around officer's hospital bed, mannequins and lady mannequins, safety inspector and new wife ... Get rolling!
A health and safety expert has been banned from driving after he was caught shaving as he overtook a line of rush hour traffic at 70mph.
Edward Hutcheson, 39, was seen leaning forward to look in his rear view mirror as he used an electric shaver.
He was banned for six months and fined £300 after being found guilty of careless driving on the A9 near Auchterarder, Perthshire, last March.
He told police he was late for a first aid course, Perth Sheriff Court heard.
Hutcheson, who had previously worked on accident investigations with the police, also claimed he had been leaning across the car at an awkward angle so he could see past a dozen mannequins he had stored in the back of his car.
The court heard how police officers saw him drive past their patrol vehicle as he used an electric shaver on his face and crane his head to look in the rear view mirror.
It is near the top end of careless driving, considering the conditions you were driving in and what was going on
Sheriff Michael Fletcher
They turned round and chased Hutcheson from the entrance to Upper Cairnie Farm, near Auchterarder, before catching up with him a mile further on.
He had one hand on the wheel and police said he appeared to be checking if he was "getting a good shave".
Hutcheson, from Blantyre, South Lanarkshire, said he was a health and safety inspector and was running late to deliver a first aid training course in Dundee.
Sheriff Michael Fletcher heard that Hutcheson stood to lose his job without a licence.
The sheriff found him guilty of careless driving.
"It is near the top end of careless driving, considering the conditions you were driving in and what was going on," the sheriff said.
A health and safety expert has been banned from driving after he was caught shaving as he overtook a line of rush hour traffic at 70mph.
Edward Hutcheson, 39, was seen leaning forward to look in his rear view mirror as he used an electric shaver.
He was banned for six months and fined £300 after being found guilty of careless driving on the A9 near Auchterarder, Perthshire, last March.
He told police he was late for a first aid course, Perth Sheriff Court heard.
Hutcheson, who had previously worked on accident investigations with the police, also claimed he had been leaning across the car at an awkward angle so he could see past a dozen mannequins he had stored in the back of his car.
The court heard how police officers saw him drive past their patrol vehicle as he used an electric shaver on his face and crane his head to look in the rear view mirror.
It is near the top end of careless driving, considering the conditions you were driving in and what was going on
Sheriff Michael Fletcher
They turned round and chased Hutcheson from the entrance to Upper Cairnie Farm, near Auchterarder, before catching up with him a mile further on.
He had one hand on the wheel and police said he appeared to be checking if he was "getting a good shave".
Hutcheson, from Blantyre, South Lanarkshire, said he was a health and safety inspector and was running late to deliver a first aid training course in Dundee.
Sheriff Michael Fletcher heard that Hutcheson stood to lose his job without a licence.
The sheriff found him guilty of careless driving.
"It is near the top end of careless driving, considering the conditions you were driving in and what was going on," the sheriff said.
posted by Student at 10:35 PM
9 Comments:
A related story:
Mannequin Man
Frank collects mannequins. He now has about forty of them, but his wife Jan has given him an ultimatum: get rid of them by Christmas or else...
Frank works in Blaenavon in the Welsh Valleys, one of the most derelict conservation areas in Britain. He tries to find new uses for unwanted buildings and has just designed a twenties Italian coffee house. His wife Jan runs a small farm in Gloucestershire.
Frank say, "it’s hard opening a new business in the Valleys. So I thought if I could get two sitting-down lady mannequins and dress them up, I could sit them at the window and people would see that there’s someone there and come in".
Frank found one mannequin in Malvern. He bought it from a ladies outfitters for £10, but she only had one arm. Then things started to get a bit out of control.
He had been negotiating for the fittings from a shop in Gloucester but he didn't realise that seven lady mannequins and eleven children were part of deal. In the end, the thing just snowballed and he's ended up about forty lounging around his house. He says, it's got a bit out of hand. Every time he and Jan turned a corner, they were confronted with a child or a nude woman.
Initially, Jan thought that just a couple of mannequins in the window was a good idea but now it's causing a domestic crisis. Jan likes a tidy house, but Frank thinks she wants them to go because she's jealous! "The mannequins are born in prime of life and never speak in fact they are the perfect women".
So Jan has given Frank an ultimatum. They are having guests for Christmas and there's no room for the mannequins too!
anyone check out the new mun internet look? so sweet, best mun internet look ever.
Best MUN ever.
So is it 'The' Memorial University of Newfoundland? that seeems more correct than saying "come to Memorial university of newfoundland".
P.S, Mannequins make for a delicious story. I'll direct if you keep up aweome scriptage about Mannequins, and people who carry them around in the back of their car.
P>S> 70 MPH is not that much= what, is there some sort of problem officer?
And, so why did the shaving guy have mannies in his boot? (that's what i call em' now.)
CocojanesABC: Janzie said...
I got a few mannequins at the cabin, you should come up and look! yeah, come up some time this summer... i'll play everything... "everything..."
CocojanesABC: Janezy said...
I meant "plan" everything, not "play" everything. The joke was about (")my(") propensity to get everyone excited about going to (")my(") cabin then never getting around to making it happen. HOWEVER, "play" offers its own intricate peculiarities quite pleasing to the dedicated ear. Thank you (")self(") for composing (or composting?) the paean to the lost pleasures of youth and summer....
I also provide the lube
-mcjanesey
(to pre-lubricate your body to protect from Pasadena mosquitos of course)
MC Janes said...
Contrary to popular opinion, I will not be bringing the lube.
Also contrary to popular opinion, I don't own a cabin....
cocobean said...
ps luke give me some teaching tips, i be teaching in two weeks!
(maybe practice on some mannequins?)
"So... first, you get yourself some mannequins" . . .
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