june 20, 2003

...just found this somewhere in my emails....

Subject:

Date: June 20, 2003 18:11

From: "tom crosbie"

To: pmj@roadrunner.nf.net

Dear Fiends (Luuk, Phil, "Crazey" Corey, Mathew, Jansie, Jacob, Susan, Jill,

Smithers, Hinchdog,etc):

My last email--struck down in Cyberspace by Cybermen!--has not reached yous,

so I try again: I have now procured a job (well, actually, I haven't... but

I'm closer than ever@@@), I have seen several WIZARD concerts (though the

last one, Broken Social Scene, I was too drunk to enjoy), have seen two

WIKEDE movies (Aguirre, Wrath of God and The Last Waltz), and fell asleep at

the wheel of my Camaro, crashing into an ampibious tour car full of

amphibians (well, not really,...), but all along I've wondered,"When will

those FUCKERS write???" I mean, I've so far only sent Phil 20 FUCKING

EMAILS (at philjohnson@hardon.fg), I keep calling Luuk's goddamned Journey's

End roon in Phoenix, and DONT GET ME STARTED ON ALL THE SEMIEROTIC ICQ CHATS

ME AND THE TERRIBLE THREESOME (vide, Crazey, Mathe, Jack and Hinchley) HAVE

HAD WHERE THEY KEEP CALLING ME BY THE WRONG NAME (crizbey or something,

however the FUCK that is?!?!?)... But all is forgiven (ps I never bothered

with Janes because, come on, who cares????) and now I can tell about my

future: another concert! This time, it's Wilco, the most famous of new

altcountry inde rock! And rumours have spread about the opening band: who?

SONIC YOUTh.... how odd, no?

I have also bought some wicked books: but when do I return? Why, around

when we hav ehte big birthday party! So get some party hats, get some

galoshes, and bring your little sisters

BECAUSE

CRIBZY's

GOING TO

BE FUCKED UP!!!!!!!!!!!!!(ie when i

return)!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

So, in recapitulation, I've been well, I've forgot your various email (so

spread this round those who get it) and write me--as the format suggests,

this is simply the first (and introductory) section of a Ggreat Wwork, and

so be prepareed, and make sure there's enough roon on yo email accuornts...

Please forgive CAPS and lewdness..

Yours,

Found: The Kwisatz Hederach

Recently discovered by TLC is the Kwisatz Hederach: Liam Hoekstra, world's strongest toddler.




As prophesied by Frank Herbert, young Liam represents a "shortening of the way". Among his abilities is chin-ups, first accomplished at age ONE!!

In other news, Jill, Melanie, me and the Real Quinton were skiing in Pennsylvania. Good times!